While everyone else was busy this week getting ready for weekend excursions, barbeques, and fireworks, many of us in the mall industry were forced to start our preparations for another holiday…Christmas. And believe me, Christmas in July is not as fun as it sounds. In fact, it’s not fun at all.
Yes, it’s that magical time of year where we must figure out where Santa’s winter home will be, and on what day in November we should crane in the 45-Foot Christmas tree. We need to make sure Santa’s contract and travel arrangements are in order, as well as prepare for the hiring and drug tests of his elves. And we must start coordinating Santa’s grand arrival at the mall, which in my case is the annual Holiday Parade of Lights.
That effing Holiday Parade of Lights.
Would someone please put me out of my misery and just shoot me now so I can get a season off?
Every year, right around this time, another part of my soul gets chipped away with a candy cane-themed icepick, and after being a marketing manager for nearly 18 years…there’s not much left to break apart.
In those 18 years, I have not missed one holiday season. Not one Black Friday. Not one Santa arrival. Not one Tree Lighting. Not one Holiday Retailer meeting. Not one Santa Breakfast. Not one Menorah Lighting. Not one shopper complaint. Not one retailer complaint.
Oh how I wish I could miss just one complaint.
I must admit, I often daydream of ways I could get a year off. Work-related injury. Unexpected pregnancy. Mental breakdown. Actually, the latter pretty much happens every year…but I still manage to show up for work.
Damn my good work ethic.
As a child, I used to absolutely love Christmas. And, as an only child, Christmas’ in the Dietlein household were wonderfully enchanted. The decorations, the food, the presents – it was truly the most wonderful time of the year!
Now, I just count the days from Thanksgiving to New Years, and pray I don’t kill anyone in-between.
